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Sure, you can walk and chew gum at the same time. But did you ever try to smoke a cigarette while riding a bike in a super short mini-dress? Me neither - til now.

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It's so relaxing to have a cigarette. Even better when I can have one with you. We're just cozy af, relaxed in my comfy oversized chair, while my smoke wraps us up like a blanket. Isn't it sexy knowing that every time you inhale, a little bit of me is inside you?

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For all of you who have requested that I smoke while operating heavy machinery ... Wish granted.

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So nice, at the end of a hard hard day, to slip a nice long cork into my mouth and just puff on it slowly, expertly, til I've sucked out every ounce of pleasure. Mmm ... feels sooo good.

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Summer is for picnics, but on a workday, summer is a smoke break on a picnic table. This video is actually two smoke breaks. Watch me relax and get some sun on my lovely legs. I think you'll enjoy how the high leg cross makes my thighs look. And foot-fans will dig my sexy sandals. Oh - I smoke too, heehee

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How do you like your smokinggirl? With that innocent, girl next-door appeal? In a pretty, floral, 100% not-slutty dress? With her bare legs tanning in the sun and her shoes dangling from her bare feet and a cork cig dangling from her lips? Yeah, I thought that's how you like your smokinggirl.

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I had not had a cork in so long (okay, maybe a week, but that's almost 200 cigarettes ago). Watch my face - see how much I enjoy it. Then I also smoke a white. I'm in a pretty summer dress - I think you'll like the scene where I'm on the picnic table, crossing and uncrossing my legs. Very satisfying - for you and me both.

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I taught my pay piggy a lesson today. He was disrespectful to his goddess. And that is unacceptable. But he paid for his mistake. Oh, did he pay.